THE LAB

Gud Looks Dad Birthday

  • Category: Birthday
  • Creation Date: Oct 25, 2020

The Origin Story

Brock Thrustwell shut the door to the breakroom behind him and leaned against the wall, out of breath. He grabbed a towel and wiped the sweat off his brow. He felt tired but satisfied with another job well done. Not too bad for a guy who went through the eighth grade three times. That third time, Brock’s parents had finally hired a tutor and some of the Fs turned to Ds and he could move up to high school. Although by then, Brock’s math teacher Mrs. Latrobe’s after school “lessons” were already giving him a bit of an edge.

Ah, good ol’ Mom and Pop. Brock took a big swig of Gatorade to replenish the copious fluids he’d just lost and then caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. The full pouty lips, the twinkling eyes with the heavy lashes – he got his mama’s good looks for sure. But what about Dad, whose birthday was coming faster than Chianti and Diamonique did in today’s scene? Dad was never much of a looker, and he wasn’t an athlete either. And yet, Dad did pretty well in life . . . Oh that’s right! He got two things from his father, and one of those things was his intellect. So Brock grabbed a crayon and made the prototype for this card.

Thanks for the “intellegince,” Dad! Because even Brock Thrustwell feels weird talking about his father’s gigantic horse cock.

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THE LAB

Gud Looks Dad Birthday

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